instinct

the sound of birds led me to the open window in my office, as I listened I realized the birds were not making the music I was so in tuned with, the element of sound had changed to distress and anger. As I peered out of my tower, into the Magnolia tree i witnessed a Chaos between birds. What was causing the confusion, anger, and distress? My eyes were following the path down to the ground, A brown Hawk of massive size stood above something gray and limp. I went outside to get a closer look, the birds were getting louder and louder with each step i took towards the giant hawk...i was in their territory and was hoping to not get attacked. The blue jays were screaming, even the house wrens had joined in. I was able to walk within 2 feet of the Hawk, he stood proud above his kill, a blue jay still fighting for life. He grabbed his prey and took flight with the neighborhood of birds following with angry sound. Into the big Oak down the block they continued to battle and then it was quiet...I witnessed instinct.

moments later:

as always a sign of things to happen

i don't know how to let go of these overwhelming emotions of loss...loss of trust,

within a place I thought would be safe.

I guess I do know...

let go of all that binds

but sometimes this seems so safe to me?

To be tied and restrained?

by thoughts that have existed many life times.

a gray area of my life,

I watch in slow motion.

AF

if i were a bird i would just fly away